Uncomfortable thank yous

Let me get my thoughts together first.

“I know you’re scared. I’m scared too.”

— “The Place Where He Inserted the Blade,” Black Country, New Road.

Included for no other reason than this song has hit the heavy rotation phase of my daily music playing, as did Lewsberg’s “Getting Closer,” Noah Yorke’s “Trying Too Hard (Lullaby),” Radiohead’s “Codex” and Saya Grey’s “AA BOUQUET FOR YOUR 180 FACE.” Somehow each has come to define a very specific sliver of my life. (Grey’s song will forever be tied to the Italian Gardens in London’s Hyde Park, where I napped on a bench while waiting for a train from Paddington to Cornwall.)

Take a deep breath, Keith, and say what you want to say

Being vulnerable and showing my emotions is a hard thing for me to do, which is why I had to pad out the top of this column with a cushion for this part of the column, which is where I reveal I finally took a look at those irritating analytics Substack provides — and saw 159 mad bastards have somehow found this little paean to the love of my life.

(No, Tony Ez, comics, not Trophy Wife. Put away the camera.)

See? Look, I’m so uncomfortable about the warm feeling I get and the validation, I’m still keeping you at arm’s length with jokes.

Honestly, what is wrong with me, eh?

Thank you, thank you, thank you. That’s what I mean to say. Thank you for being my ride-or-die in this dusty little corner of the web. We all need a bulwark against the madness infecting the world, and comics — and my comics family — is mine. I hope this column proves a small distraction, maybe even a salve, against the … the everything for you.

Now I wish I’d bought you a gift. Oh, wait, I know. How would you like not one BUT TWO pages of pure crime? That’s right, the intellectual-property larceny continues with my little bootleg about a specific C-list, flag-wearing Marvel character mentioned ad nauseam in previous columns.

Right then. (No nipples in this one. I mean, they’re there, but covered up in clothing, so use your imagination, I guess?)

Old Jack finds he’s bitten off more than he can chew and now is being bitten and chewed. The irony.

I hope you’re enjoying the crime, erm, story so far. And if you are, please tell me. Who’s your favorite C-list character? I know every serious comic-book reader has one.

I hope you are safe and warm and ice free this winter. Until next time.